Primary motivator

When you see people's intellect fading away due to dementia, when brain is loosing control and cultivated manners do not cover primary impulses any more then you see that fear is a very primary motivating factor.

But fear is very present in our every-day decisions - not only when the brain is loosing control. If you look behind some of your core priorities and decisions, you may find that a lot of your actions are intended to increase an inner feeling of safety. Or, when you investigate some of your first reactions on other people's arguments in discussions, you may detect yourself feeling attacked. The common root is fear/anxiety. The two core options inherited from our very past when fear comes up is to attack or flee.

  • In modern times there are a lot of options between those two extreme reactions. (taking it with humor is a great one).
  • You are not alone with your fear. Guess what: Person's attacking you (verbal, nonverbal or physically) may fear you more than you fear them! The best strategy might be, assuring the others that you are coming in peace.
  • Fear and the instinctive reactions are good advisors in situations of imminent danger (for physical health - e.g. when face-to-face with a saber-toothed tiger), but not in most common daily situations (e.g. in meetings, negotiations, when having discussions with friends or family members etc).
  • The power of others often is overestimated while the own power is underestimated. In many cases where you might experience fear, there is no reason for it.
A good strategy is to eliminate fear and the automatic reactions wherever there is no actual danger given and replace it with a moment of meditation before any overhasty reaction.

Related posts: Your situation does not suck, The fear, About habits, Plan to get fear done, Something more important, Spam critics, The present moment.

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